Our recent guest post on aging inspired yet another guest post, this one by long-term reader Joe Gardewin. I hope his words inspire you as much as they inspired me!

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Dear Doc Roxanne, 

I may not be an expert on aging but, at 78, I do consider myself aged or, as my friend, Tom Isern, says, “seasoned.” In other words, most of my life is in my rearview mirror. Ha! That is not a bad thing, because I’ve had a pretty full life. But I do hope to live for a while yet and, in all honesty, I think I will. I think that, in part, because I have a good family doc who has now followed me for 20 years. In her words I am “… not the patient I worry about most.” 

These are my thoughts on [hopefully] living a long, healthy life: 

1. Be generous. I think generosity is key to good mental health. When you give you get more than you receive. I established an endowment, which I continue to grow, at the Museum of Art. I also support several causes important to me. If you do not have the financial means to be generous monetarily, then be generous with your time and words. If you are able, then volunteer.

2. Brains need exercise. My friend, Suzanne Kelley, suggested I volunteer to judge for the Midwest Independent Publishers Association (MIPA) awards. I did so, and am now in my third year. My categories are Philosophy & Religion, and Regional Poetry. I judged 23 books over the past two years. The judging process employs scoring templates. These templates require reasoned comments to justify ratings. In other words, critical thinking. An added benefit is having had the opportunity to discover the theologian and metaphysician Frithrof Schoun, whose “Eye of the Heart” is remarkable. I also thought highly of Beth Allison Barr’s “The Making of Biblical Womanhood.” Of course there were a few clunkers. Reviewing a clunker and letting the author down gently is a challenge. This judging activity keeps my brain active.

I used to write often. As a high school teacher I wrote many letters of recommendation and was good at “selling” the kiddos. I also critiqued their college essays. That’s why I still get care packages. But also, as a very successful former student told me a week ago, “You kept it real; we knew you would be honest with us.”

3. If you live alone (my wife has been gone 19 years), having a pet can be a good thing. Although I like puppies, kitties work best for me. I have shelter cats who are rascals but who provide unconditional love. In my daughter’s words, they give me “someone to talk to.” Cleaning litter boxes keeps me humble. When I was debating whether to adopt kittens, my veterinarian said simply “Do not let your age stop you from adopting.” So I got two: one who chose me and a second, his best buddy, who came along as a package deal. Then, as fate would have it, my Marine daughter deployed and…long story short…I ended up with her kitties also.

4. There is no four because in Korea, where my wife was born, four is an unlucky number.

5. Five, a sense of humor. A sense of humor is key. Marriage, parenting, and life are easier if you can laugh. I still smile every time I picture my wife sharpening her favorite cleaver and beckoning me to come closer. I take delight in an email correspondence I maintain with two college buddies, one in Cincinnati and one in Argyle, Manitoba. We also call each other semi-irregularly. We enjoy harassing each other and drawing on our considerable shared experience. We also bemoan this and that,  especially our infirmities. We consider ourselves a mini-CBSG (Codger Benevolent Support Group). 

Okay, there you have it. For what it is worth, I have been thinking about this more recently because I have lost quite a few friends in the past three or four years. It makes me appreciate what I have, and I hope it does the same for you.