Late last year I had an interview with a major news network on the topic of New Years’ Resolutions. I decided not to talk about the popular though self-defeating goals that are nearly impossible to sustain and end up making people feel badly about themselves and their efforts. I didn’t discuss limiting calories, denying yourself things that bring you joy, joining a gym, or signing up for a yoga class. Instead I decided to talk about being kind to yourself. 

Since diets do not generally work, I suggested simply trying to eat more fruits and vegetables. Every different color represents its own phytonutrient, and each phytonutrient has its own significant benefits for reducing inflammation, enhancing cell function, slowing aging, and improving mental health. Because the typical American diet contains few if any fruits and veggies, it’s easy to increase the amount you eat. But the American breakfast contains very little whole fruit, and almost no vegetables, so it’s very hard to cram the recommended daily amounts into just lunch and dinner. One compelling way to eat more produce, therefore, is to add something at breakfast. You might choose to eat a handful of strawberries or blueberries, but you could also have a few forkfuls of sweet potato, or leftover green beans (perhaps with slivered almonds, or hummus). It doesn’t have to be every day. Do the math — even a few times a week will add up to over a hundred more servings annually, and a lot more nutrients over time.

In a similar vein, if you’d like to move more, remember that you’re not training for the Olympics (at least for now). Start low; go slow. Feel free to think about where it might take you, but focus on setting small, doable goals. The last thing you want is an injury that puts you right back where you started. If you’d like, listen to an audiobook or invite a friend. It’s amazing how a quickly two miles pass with a companion, whether human, canine, or electronic. 

Try not to let yourself get too hungry. This is of general importance all the time. Getting irritable feels miserable, but it also makes it hard to concentrate. I’m a huge fan of easy-peel tangerines. You can eat one, or you can eat more. Whatever works. If a handful of peanuts is your thing, then trust your gut. What doesn’t work is a candy bar, or stack of cookies, or the myriad of ultra-manufactured products that entertain without providing real nourishment, in which case, you’ll likely be frantic to repeat the process once the initial rush wears off.

My final recommendation is that you not try to change everything all at once. Being kind to oneself means setting realistic goals, making time to rest, being patient, and remembering that perfection is not sustainable. Also, there’s nothing magic about January, or springtime. Now might be when you start a two-minute morning stretch before getting out of bed, or when you commit to taking a few deep breaths on seeing your first crocus or daffodil of the season. Next month might be when you commit to eat more fresh greens. Summer might be when you start eating a peach every morning.  

If you want to live the years ahead with clear vision, intact faculties, mobile joints, and a more resilient attitude, spend a few minutes this week thinking about approachable goals that generate small, incremental successes. Failure whittles away at your sense of self-respect, and makes it that much harder to drag yourself back up for another try. Success, on the other hand, begets more of the same.